It's Too Early To Be Thinking About This

The creation of the universe was a highly unlikely event. I think everyone agrees with that statement and there is not a lot of ground to refute it because no one was around before the creation of the universe (except for my friend Steve Omnitron). A question I have pondered often is, "Why don't new universes spontaneously form in the middle of my living room during afternoon tea?" It's a tough question. One would assume that since the universe has existed for so long it would be probable that an improbable event would occur again. Right? Wrong? RightWrong?

However, I just got on a thought train after reading my Introduction to Quantum Chemistry book and perusing Physics Forums I have come to a new realization: with all the improbable events that occur in an atomic system, perhaps the universe gets it's "quota" of improbability and the need for a new universe to be created is quelled for another billion billion years.

I mean, if there is a node in between two s-orbitals and in that node there is 0 probability of finding an electron and there is an electron in one s-orbital and it wants to get to the other, how does the electron get to the other s-orbital? It happens. But how? How does the electron pass through a region where there is no probability of finding it?

It's like saying you need to get from your house on one side of a cliff to your friends' house on the other side and you get to your friend's house even though the FUCKING BRIDGE IS GONE.

Now I know you are going to say that it's just tunneling that occurs but that makes no damn sense and seems so improbable.

But there seems to be so much shit going on in the bottom that is just ludicrous and confusing. So much that the Universe goes, "Okay, that's enough retarded shit for today" (the Universe's words, not mine). And it's all this wacky business that prevents another Big Bang from occurring between two fat people as they make love for the first time in the backseat of a Chevy pickup in the parking lot of a McDonald's in the middle of a Tuesday afternoon (this event itself is not very uncommon. If you don't believe me, I suggest you watch Maury and my point will be made)

I know that I am excluding a lot of math and critical thinking that is the very foundation of modern physics but fuck it, this stuff is fun to think about without "reality" telling me I'm a moron for ignoring probability calculations and not carrying the 1.

The only problem is that when I try and do the math (by "do" I mean "read" and by "read" I mean "look at" and by "look at" I mean "not look at") my brain hurts. And when my brain hurts I end up playing video games. Maybe I should just cut out the middle man, and so should all of you.

Hey, I think Maury's on.